1. Coughing in the direction of other people and watching them cringe...muahaha, behold the power of the sick! They feel a cold wind as I pass by, and to them I am the soul of Plague embodied. [Editor's Note: Yes, there was something very wrong with me at this point.]
2. Requesting a library book that I rather want to read, but that I can wait for, making sure that a few other people have already checked out or put on hold all available copies—sometime a few weeks or months later, perhaps, I'll get an email and it'll be the book. Out of nowhere, as if by magic, the book comes into my possession, as at that late juncture I've forgotten I requested it in the first place.
3. Warm late-September days. They're almost as good as warm late-spring days, except there's the expectation here that they'll soon turn brisk and bitter, as opposed to the way spring days turn humid and rainy.
...and not so great:
1. The contradictions inherent in having a salad that literally weighs a ton. A salad, you see, is supposed to be light, not this heavy, crushing mass of leafy bits. A salad that size wouldn't really work right, seeing as it'd become so compressed at the bottom of the bowl that the leaves would turn dark and crushed with juices, rather than fluffy, lacy and crisp as they should be. In any case, I'm only talking conceptually, despite the fact that someone did make such a salad, because I don't eat salad. It's a waste of time. Editor's Note: Again...